Why I Choose to Dilly-Dally
My new favorite word: Dilly-Dally. Not only is it fun to say, it’s fun to do!
It means exactly what it sounds like. To waste time. To wander. To take way longer than necessary doing basically nothing on purpose. And somewhere in the middle of my busy work days, adult mothering, errands, bill paying, house chores, etc. I realized this is actually the thing I want more of, not less.
The Case for Dilly-Dallying
I’ve never been a habit-tracker, a color-coded-calendar person, a five-systems-before-9am person. Believe me, I tried! That’s just not me. But even without all that structure, life still fills up — work, the never-ending logistics of the day, the whole running list of things that need tending to. And every so often, I don’t want to manage any of it, even loosely. I don’t want to follow a plan, check a box, or optimize the day or morning. I want to wander into a store with no list and touch stuff I have no intention of buying. I want to take the long way. I want to stand in the coffee aisle longer than is necessary and not feel a single ounce of guilt about it.
That’s dilly-dallying. And I think it’s underrated.
What Dilly-Dallying Actually Looks Like for Me
Nothing dramatic. Just:
Wandering around an antique store with zero plans to buy anything.
Taking the scenic route home for no reason at all.
Reading the back of a book I already know I’m not going to read.
Standing in the back yard for absolutely not reason.
Letting a Saturday morning stay completely unscheduled and seeing what happens.
None of this produces anything. That’s kind of the point. Dilly-Dallying.
Why This Is Different From Rest
I want to be clear this isn’t the same as intentional rest, which has its own whole system now too — apps, routines, “how to rest properly.” Dilly-dallying isn’t trying to recharge you for anything. It’s not restorative in the productive sense. It’s just aimless, and I think that’s exactly what makes it valuable. It’s the one thing in my week that isn’t in service of anything else. No point to it whatsoever.
I don’t dilly-dally every day. Most days still have structure to them, because life requires that (and I consider myself to be a productive person). But more so lately, I’ve been letting go of the structure and it turns out that’s often when I feel the most like myself.
So: pick a day, or even just an hour, and refuse to give it a purpose. Wander. Linger. Let it be slow for no reason. You don’t owe anyone an efficient afternoon.
Do This: Give Yourself Permission to Dilly-Dally
Tell me — do you already have a version of this? A thing you do with zero plan, just to wander through it? I want to know what your dilly-dally looks like.
